1. Introduction
1. Romans 12:21 = "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."
1. There’s an old saying in sports: "The best defense is a good offense."
1. Means: the best way to beat the opponent is to score more points than he does.
2. Same with parenting on this subject:
1. Don’t just try to stop Satan’s efforts to make your children impure; but aid God’s efforts to develop their desire for purity.
2. Same with parenting on this subject:
1. Don’t just try to stop Satan’s efforts to make your children impure; but aid God’s efforts to develop their desire for purity.

1. Jeremiah 29:11 = "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
1. God’s Word shows us how to have the best life possible.
1. Proverbs 10:28 = "The prospect of the righteous is joy, but the hopes of the wicked come to nothing."
2. Your life teaches this the most.
1. If you’re (usually) happy, they’ll want your life. (Your purity.)
2. If you’re not (usually) happy, they won’t want your life. (Your purity.)

1. Proverbs 5:16-19 = "Should your springs overflow in the streets,
   your streams of water in the public squares?

¹⁷ Let them be yours alone,
never to be shared with strangers.

¹⁸ May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.

¹⁹ A loving doe, a graceful deer—
may her breasts satisfy you always,
may you ever be captivated by her love."

5. Three: a respect for the opposite sex
1. Genesis 1:27 = "So God created man in his own image,
   in the image of God he created him;
   male and female he created them."
1. Jesus had an extremely high view of women.
1. Not as objects, but as the crown of creation.
6. Four: a reverence for the human body
1. 1 Cor 6:18-19 = "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. ¹⁹Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own…"
1. When we have a high self-esteem, we view much of sexual explicitness in the media as degrading and distasteful.
7. Five: a high view of marriage
1. Genesis 2:19-25 = "Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. ²⁰ So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field.
   But for Adam no suitable helper was found. ²¹ So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. ²² Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib ^[j] he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

²³ The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called 'woman, '
for she was taken out of man."

²⁴ For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

²⁵ The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame."

2. Hebrews 13:4 = "Marriage should be honored by all."
1. Article in the news this week: "Is Monogamy Realistic?"
1. Answer with your own example and faith.
1. Note: If been divorced, talk through that with child. Don’t avoid the subject. Address it.

8. Six: an understanding of the nature of sexual temptation

1. Immorality and lust are sins.
1. Colossians 3:5-6 = "Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. ⁶Because of these, the wrath of God is coming."
2. But temptation itself is not a sin (it’s natural and healthy).
3. So, must clarify what is lust:
1. James 1:13-15 = "When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; ¹⁴but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. ¹⁵Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death."
1. Temptation is not sin.
2. Q: When does temptation become sin (lust)?
1. Sam and Geri Laing’s list:
1. "they continue to look at something explicitly"
2. "the look at someone for the purpose of desiring them sexually"
3. "they engage in fantasies involving sexual images or sexual activity"
3. Lust does not necessarily occur just because any of the following things happen to your child: (quoting Laings)
1. "their heart skips a beat when someone they like walks up"
2. "they notice an attractive girl or cute boy"
3. "they struggle with the urge to look at pornographic magazines or images or video"
4. "something comes before their eyes that will incite lust, but they look away"
5. "a sexual thought passes through their minds"
6. "their body has a physical response – even when they are not focused on sexual things."
4. Satan is an accuser (Rev 12) and a deceiver (2 Cor 11:3):
1. Some of our children tend to be more "accused".
1. We must help our teens not to feel overly accused by sexual thoughts and feelings.
2. Some of our children tend to be more "deceived".
1. We must help them to have a deep conviction about the consequences of sin.
4. All children need to be taught HOW to avoid sexual sin:
1. Guarding their eyes
1. Proverbs 4:25 = "Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you."
2. Guarding their feet
1. Proverbs 5:8 = "Keep to a path far from her,
   do not go near the door of her house…"
3. Guarding their hearts
1. Proverbs 4:23 = "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life."
4. And how to repent and be open when they fall
1. Psalm 32 (1-2; all if time) = "Blessed is he
   whose transgressions are forgiven,
   whose sins are covered.

² Blessed is the man
whose sin the LORD does not count against him
and in whose spirit is no deceit."

5. The best defense is a good offense.
1. Teach your children to fill their minds with good and pure thoughts:
1. Colossians 3:1-4 = "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. ²Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. ³For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. ⁴When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory."
2. Philippians 4:8-9 = "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ⁹Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you."
3. Romans 8:5 = "Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires."

9. Seven: an open door to talk

1. 2 Corinthians 6:11-13 = "We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you. ¹²We are not withholding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us. ¹³As a fair exchange—I speak as to my children—open wide your hearts also."
1. Number one rule = don’t over-react!

10. Eight: a willingness to be guided

1. Proverbs 4 (all)
1. ^"Listen, my sons, to a father's instruction;
   pay attention and gain understanding.

² I give you sound learning,
so do not forsake my teaching.

³ When I was a boy in my father's house,
still tender, and an only child of my mother,

⁴ he taught me and said,
"Lay hold of my words with all your heart;
keep my commands and you will live.

⁵ Get wisdom, get understanding;
do not forget my words or swerve from them.

⁶ Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you;
love her, and she will watch over you.

⁷ Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom.
Though it cost all you have, get understanding.

⁸ Esteem her, and she will exalt you;
embrace her, and she will honor you.

⁹ She will set a garland of grace on your head
and present you with a crown of splendor."

¹⁰ Listen, my son, accept what I say,
and the years of your life will be many.

¹¹ I guide you in the way of wisdom
and lead you along straight paths.

¹² When you walk, your steps will not be hampered;
when you run, you will not stumble.

¹³ Hold on to instruction, do not let it go;
guard it well, for it is your life.

¹⁴ Do not set foot on the path of the wicked
or walk in the way of evil men.

¹⁵ Avoid it, do not travel on it;
turn from it and go on your way.

¹⁶ For they cannot sleep till they do evil;
they are robbed of slumber till they make someone fall.

¹⁷ They eat the bread of wickedness
and drink the wine of violence.

¹⁸ The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn,
shining ever brighter till the full light of day.

¹⁹ But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness;
they do not know what makes them stumble.

²⁰ My son, pay attention to what I say;
listen closely to my words.

²¹ Do not let them out of your sight,
keep them within your heart;

²² for they are life to those who find them
and health to a man's whole body.

²³ Above all else, guard your heart,
for it is the wellspring of life.

²⁴ Put away perversity from your mouth;
keep corrupt talk far from your lips.

²⁵ Let your eyes look straight ahead,
fix your gaze directly before you.

²⁶ Make level paths for your feet
and take only ways that are firm.

²⁷ Do not swerve to the right or the left;
keep your foot from evil."

11. Nine: a joyful life in God’s kingdom
1. Romans 14:17-18 = "For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, ¹⁸because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by men."
2. Nehemiah 8:10 = "The joy of the Lord is your strength."
12. Ten: the importance of dating and marrying within the church
1. Now, you’re ready for this one.
1. Most parents start here. Big mistake. They’re in danger of teaching rules not heart.
2. Two main scriptures:
1. 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 = "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? ¹⁵What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? ¹⁶What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people."
   ¹⁷"Therefore come out from them
   and be separate, says the Lord.
   Touch no unclean thing,
   and I will receive you."
   ¹⁸"I will be a Father to you,
   and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."
2. 1 Cor 7:39 = "A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord."
13. Discussion